So…

I’ve been feeling kinda sick the last two days, my stomach is awful it pitchs every morning when I wake up when I sit up and I’m scrambling to the bathroom to make sure I don’t puke all over the floor. but then I DON’T PUKE! its fustrating. Also the only thing that helps keep it calm is not moving at all, or sipping on sprite and eating some saltines. What’s more is the fact that I can eat and keep food down but then my stomach starts rolling again. I talked to my friend, and she asked me some odd questions like how my sense of smell is, if its stronger. I told her that I had thrown out some meat cause it was bad and it had gotten worse in our trash can. I could smell it through the whole house, it was gross my husband says he couldn’t smell it till he got to the kitchen I told him he was dumb if he couldn’t smell it. Now I have told my mother all about this right? she think’s I’m pregnant, and this is what I have to say to that. I can’t get that damn lucky, the only people who ever get pregnant are people who either 1. don’t want to be pregnant, or 2 really don’t need a baby. I say this in light of the fact that a friends girlfriend got pregnant and she cried about how she DIDN’T want to be pregnant for like 2 days. And yes I know I sound jealous and I am, and that really bugs me. I have never in my whole life ever been jealous of anyone before. Especially someone younger than me, but I am horribly so with this girl, because in all honesty that should be me, I want a baby, I am ready for baby so why can’t I have a baby!?!?!? Why is it I have to have PCOS, that is gonna make it extreamly difficult to have kids, why is it I’m the broken one, the one who never slept around with a bunch of guys who is in love with someone, who’s married and did it all in the correct order. why am I being punished? And people telling me that my being sick is the possibility of pregnancy, which I know what it sounds like and if I didn’t know better I’d think I was too, makes it all the more hard to accept that I am not getting pregnant. So to make my mom happy I am going to take a test to prove her wrong, and everyone else, so that they all know that the only people who get pregnant are people who don’t want to be.